The Lady’s Guide to Petticoats and Piracy

A Book Review of the novel by Mackenzi Lee

This book was laaaame. So lame. The title sounds so exciting. A guide… petticoats… piracy. The word “Guide” in the title implied that the characters have something to teach! Unfortunately, they were clueless and shouldn’t be writing any kind of guidebook.

The Lady’s Guide to Petticoats and Piracy is about Felicity Montague, a young woman who wants to be a doctor but is rejected from every medical school she approaches because of her gender. In an effort to gain medical training, she goes to Germany to try to convince a reclusive surgeon, who is coincidently her ex-best friend’s fiancé, to train her. Since she has no money when she makes this plan, she teams up with a suspicious young woman who also wants to meet this surgeon and adventure ensues.

This book is a long 480 pages. The writing was entertaining enough. It was clearly for a young audience so it is easy to read, but it heavily relies on a typical millennial plot device. Namely, the book focuses on two girls who are intelligent and special, which gives them plot armor that saves them even though they don’t actually make intelligent decisions.

I read this because I wanted to read a book about a character who is ACE (Asexual). I honestly, don’t think the author does much with Felicity’s sexuality, as it is only mentioned a few times. It is debatable whether ignoring Felicity’s sexuality is appropriate; especially, since the author includes a strange experimental lesbian scene that is, frankly, pandering to the audience.

Even though almost everything in the book is very realistic to the time period, somehow magical dragons become involved. And yet, even with magical dragons, petticoats, and piracy, not to mention experimental lesbian kisses, very little actually happens in the book. The main characters are boring and entitled. Felicity grows a little by realizing that she actually is just like other girls, but I found her personality tiring. I think I might have liked this book when I was 13, but, alas, I am an adult woman and consequently, I give this book 2/5 whales.

The Don’t Call Me Ishmael Official Book Rating, Sponsored by Pirates for Whale Rights (PWR):

2/5 Whales. It blows.